Many of my clients feel this way.
They know that they have many advantages in life-- maybe they are comfortable financially, maybe they have a good husband, maybe they see others struggling with life’s problems more than they are. And so they say to themselves, “I shouldn’t feel depressed, look what I have going for me”, or “I know people who have it worse than I do”, or “I have a nice house, I have enough to eat, I have no reason to be depressed”.
Sadly, they have often been suffering like this for a long time-sometimes their whole lives. They have hesitated to seek help because they “shouldn’t” be feeling this way. They feel bad for spending the money to go to therapy. They feel bad for taking the time to go to therapy. They are somewhat sheepish when telling me how they feel because they might even expect me to scold them for feeling bad!
So if they have all these advantages in life, why ARE they feeling depressed?
It’s because depression does not depend on what’s happening OUTSIDE of us, it depends on what’s happening INSIDE of us. Depression can be caused by chemicals in the brain that are not of the right proportions, or not moving between our brain cells in the right concentrations. It can be caused by unhelpful and sometimes harmful ways of thinking (often thoughts about ourselves) that we have learned from childhood. Depression can be associated with, or a result of, having some other issue like anxiety or Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). It’s not necessarily a result of things going badly in your life right now.
And guess what? One of the symptoms of depression is feeling guilty for being depressed. And feeling guilty about being depressed can keep us from seeking help.
There are ways to treat depression including medication, therapy, or a combination of medication and therapy. There are psychotherapies that are just as effective in treating mild to moderate depression as medication. I encourage anyone who is unhappy to get help.
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